{ gentlemen } - yogi. photographer. woman. austin, tx.

A couple of years ago I posted about my dating life. In a very humorous review of some good, bad, and terribly exhausting experiences I pretty much chucked the whole idea. That lasted a while, actually two years. This year I have ventured out a few times on actual dates. My opinion is still similar to previous years, I just don't believe I'm cut out for casual dating, it's so much work and I have other ways I enjoy spending time. There is a lovely balance that must be struck and when it's found, being out with someone can be entirely enjoyable (I've recently learned).

What I have learned this time around is that there are actual gentlemen in the world. It's incredible to have never witnessed certain tiny gestures that make a massive impact on how I feel when I go out with someone. So, in advance, dudes...you're welcome for this list of things that you can easily begin to practice with your lover, dates, random women you want to impress......


1. Walk between her and the street/traffic. I swear this made me feel like a true princess, how am I almost 32 and no man had ever done this for me?! Guys, come on, it's so simple but so darn sweet and makes you look like a hero.

2. Pay. I know it is 2014, but honestly it's that good old fashioned care that makes it feel like a treat to be taken out. If I have to buy my own (and god forbid YOUR - this happens way more than I can believe) meal, I would rather save that money for things like yoga and gemstones. I feel pretty confident that most ladies would agree with me. I will offer to pay if I want to.

3. Be chivalrous. Open my door, pull out my chair, etc. If you aren't sure what that means, ask your significant other's dad...he will tell you how to treat his baby.

4. Communicate. Confirm plans, respond to calls/texts, even just to say "busy right now." It's disrespectful to assume that we don't need notice of changes in plans or time to adjust our schedule. Value my time, both in person and via phone. I am pretty low maintenance and spontaneous, however even I require some time to get ready, drive, park, arrange my day, etc. Just give it as much as you can and let's be honest you're on your phone all the time men, some of you even bring your phone into yoga (which is lame unless you're on call for work).

5. Make the plan. Ask for opinions, that's fine, but if you invite me out I don't want the added work of making the plans. Take me out, take responsibility off my shoulders for an evening. I can't promise you that all girls will be as honest as I am, but if you make a choice that sucks, I would be the girl to speak up and offer suggestions.

That's enough to get you started. Good luck, and thank you for making the dating world a tiny bit less frightening to women.





*** Disclaimer time ***

After having been pampered in the ways mentioned above I have a greater appreciation for dates, but I am not actively dating so don't take this the wrong way, I'll probably still say "no thanks."