Saturday, February 26, 2011

{ jostling security } ~ austin area photographer

There may be a inclination toward bravery that begins in the womb, but we all reach a higher degree of this trait by choice.

There is something rewarding in knowing that I am okay with putting myself and my fears on the line. A rush I can only assume is adrenaline comes over me when I reach outside my zone of safety and forfeit the nets of "acceptability" to teach myself courage. I am posting a picture now that is the second hardest for me to share. Once before, I shared a picture of my back before surgery, that was definitely the hardest. However, I admit this one follows closely behind, as I am sadly a very self critical being. In attempts to overcome my qualms about my body as viewed by others, I offer up my self esteem by way of photograph.

{ ready or not...mostly not }

So no covering my lumps and bumps or erasing my stretch marks, it's just the way I look and I want to love it as much as I love what I have inside. In order to do that, I have to be confident I am treating myself right and working hard, that's the only way I can be proud. With the acquisition of my new job came new habits. In order for me to drop my girls at school, shower, and be at work on time...I have to get up and head to the gym at 5:30 am. I do that 5 days a week and on the weekends I try to make it to yoga or run on my treadmill. Sometimes I feel discouraged, because I think after all that work I should be more fit. My silly thyroid is a pain and my back being fused is a hindrance, but when I stop and think about it, I feel pretty good inside about not letting those things deter me. I'm not crazy about my figure, but I think the more I attain happiness on my inside, the more I am driven to love the outside of me as well.



Daria said...

Beautiful Girl, I wish you could see yourself the way that I see you. You are so stunning, inside and outside.I definitely admire your bravery Amelia, it's not easy to put yourself out there. You are so strong and such a shining light in my life. I love you.

Did I mention you're beautiful? You really and truly are.

Lisa M. said...

Um I totally agree with Daria and might I add that this woman has three, count em, three children and she still looks great!!

Anonymous said...

I should send you a picture of my body in a bikini bottom....then you'll feel exactly as amazing as you look LOL! Good grief! I can't remember the last time I even SAW my hipbone! Youre beautiful lady, OWN IT!