Wednesday, October 1, 2008

a long look back

There is no way...

Vainly, my first reaction is that I cannot be 26 years old (I feel stuck eternally at 25). My second reaction is a tender one, my motherly side. This side of me says that there is no way it has been 10 years since I gave birth to this sweet girl.

Would I have ever guessed that life would bring so many unexpected blessings from such an awkward situation? Never. The Lord has made beauty from the ashes of my bad decisions. Everyday I am grateful that this is the case, because had it not been for my lack of good judgement, I would not have Avery and I just can't imagine life without her!

{ reminiscing }

Avery and me, at ages 1 and 17. Proof that I have tried to rock out the red for me?...not so much.

Tomorrow she turns 10. It's not possible. The math works number wise, but the years, the memories, they have all happened too quickly. How can this be?!

Just as I said above, I'm stuck around age 25...I have placed Avery in my mind forever about the age 5, as she appears in this next picture. I guess it's something we all have to grow through. I"m trying desperately to let her grow and to be right there for her through *SHRIEK* female adolescence, but it's so hard to see her grow up! I think we can even share a bra now.

{ reminiscing }

Please give me wisdom all you women who have endured so gracefully through these years with your daughters. Does it get easier to watch them grow up or more difficult? I want to keep her my baby forever, and yet there is something so exciting on the horizon of being able to share a bond with her deeper than just mama and baby, but mother and friend.... perhaps I am an idealist.

My music musing today is one of my very most favorite songs ever. You are listening to Ray LaMontagne sing "Hold You In My Arms." I love this song so much and I felt like it was very suitable to today's randomness and whining on my behalf.

xo~ Amelia


Jennifer Paganelli said...

What a sweet post I love the joy in your face as you hold her in your arms and the music is so poignant...Jennifer

Tonya said...

This made me feel so are a beautful Mother and those girls are so lucky to have you! You seem to tackle everything with such grace. Your girls are so gorgeous and they are so loved by you and your hubby!

What a beautiful post...tugs on my heart a bit! Hope you all enjoy a Happy Birthday!



carole said...

It doesn't get easier but it doesn't get more difficult either. You'll both do a gradual growing that helps you along. With one daughter out of state now and the other out of the country (did I just say that?)I still talk to them every day. They are both still 5 in my eyes too - probably because it is such a sweet age. You'll survive and I imagine you'll do it beautifully ;) Happy happy bday to your "first" little girl.

Anonymous said...

I can so relate to your feelings.
My "baby" girls are now 5, 16 and 22. Through the years we have laughed, cried and grown together. The relationships take on different labels at different phases and stages...I have been mommy, teacher,counselor,friend and oddly...with my oldest I now feel an almost "sister" bond with her. But above all we just share that deep undefined connection that only a mother and daughter can feel...I don`t think there is a word. We are all so BLESSED! Enjoy...there is SO much more to come!!

Lisa~ said...

wow, time has flown. All I can give for advice is, love them like crazy and let them make more choices as they get older (really scarey one lol) and take lots of video! There is nothing more sweet than looking at a video of your child when they were in their young sweet years... oh yea and pray alot!!

PamperingBeki said...

Awww, she's beautiful!!

Mi Pelucita Boutique said...

Both of you look so beautiful.

MomRaun said...

To my 'baby'
Your relationships with your children will change with the years, but you will never cease being their mother. All those emotions you feel with them now will still be there when they are 25, 40, and even 60 (Mimi confirms this). I, too, cannot imagine life without our lovely Avery Shae. She is a precious treasure graciously dropped in our lives by a loving Creator.

With love,

MomRaun said...

To my youngest....My 'Baby'
Your relationships with your children will change as the years go by, but you will never cease to be their mother. All the emotions you feel now will still be there when they are 25, 40, and even 60 (confirmed by Mimi.)
I, too, cannot imagine life without our lovely Avery Shae. She is a precious treasure dropped into our lives by a loving Creator. Thank you for the sacrifices you made for her.

With love,