{ it began with a dog } - yogi. photographer. student. austin, tx

There is really only one person who knows the full extent of my yogic journey, and I am not speaking third person. Forever my gratitude will be immense for my first yoga teacher, John. The one person who witnessed my body transform from disconnected and weak into a body that is alive and growing strong.

Just a few days ago at 6am I was honored to lead John and his amazing fiancee Laura (check out her blog) through yoga practice. This marked one of the most humbling moments of my life.



I was given John's name and number when I asked a friend about private yoga lessons. I had no idea at the time how my life would change, I never dreamt of the passion I would develop for this practice. There is no way I can know exactly what John felt. I showed up on his porch with quite the challenge, a fused spine and absolutely no yoga experience. He faithfully guided me through downward facing dog (and many other basic shapes that I felt were impossible), adjusting me and patiently explaining how I could activate muscles and deepen the postures (I thought he was overly optimistic). He shared with me things that were rich in worth, planted seeds of awareness in my mind and body, even though the fruit was meager early on. My physical self did not comprehend much at that point. My spirit was thirsty, I was determined, and John was willing to share his knowledge of yoga as well as his time. He gave me a precious gift that would reshape my entire life from the inside to the outside.

Never in those Monday night private sessions would I ever have imagined myself moving fluidly, breathing evenly, and certainly not guiding others to do these things. I listened, I tried, and I rested with a sweet little chihuahua named Batman nuzzling me during savasana. This was my reprieve, it was my water in the desert, yet I did not understand. Maybe John had intuition, because he continued to teach me and share beautiful yogic truths with me. When he and Laura walked into the studio I felt such a flood of love for this incredible couple. This duo of life changing sweetness. My heart swells when I think of not only how my own life has been touched, but also my girls. Through encouragement that John gave me about being a single mom and working away from the home, I really felt inspired to strive to be the best and mot authentic mother and example to my ladies. The lives of those I am now blessed to work with are also recipients of John's faithfulness to share the practice of yoga, philosophy, energy, mindfulness, and trust.

Cliche though it may sound, keep giving whatever gift you are here to share...this is how the world is changed and love is spread!

{ pare to gold } - yogi. witness. photographer. austin, tx

"Let your 'Yes' be 'Yes' and your 'No' be 'No.' For whatever is more than these is from the evil one. Matthew 5:37 NKJ Bible

Satya - Truth. Truth is the highest rule of conduct or morality. "Truth is God and God is Truth." - Mahatma Gandhi

As fire burns impurities and refines gold, so the fire of truth cleanses the yogi and burns up the dross in him. - B.K.S. Iyengar 'Light On Yoga'

We really are not so different. Truth burns open the path for love to move fluidly through us all.




In the last few months I have been drawn to the beauty of silence. When the words are pure and simple, the truth is clear. There is such a great impact when all is quiet, thoughts and emotions surface and pass undisturbed by chatter. This is healing. What must be said is said, truth is spoken and the space following allows that truth to drop in and plant a seed in the heart. I desire to cultivate and enhance this trait in my life. I'm not planning to take the vow of Mauna (vow of silence) right now, but to become very conscious of my words and focus on listening more. I love listening to others and I want to sharpen my ability to hear myself, to know my 'Yes' and my 'No.' Before sharing anything, I want to become a strong witness to my purpose and intent behind what comes up to say. To see the truth, the purest, most potent love, and have that be the pattern of my speech.




This is a work for me. I have grown up a talker, I love to chatter away, I am easily excited to open up. Saying many words that are just taking up time and energy and have no power.

Another way I have over used words in the past was by explaining things in detail un-necessarily. I felt continually misunderstood and would just beat my point into the ground. As I've gone through layers of my healing work something I have been able to see and work through has been that my feelings of being seen the wrong way were all because of how I viewed myself. I wasn't trying to convince others of my true intention, I was trying to show myself that I had good inside. When the words stopped, so did my false self belief. It hasn't been an easy healing, what it has been is a most beneficial. Anytime these old habits of ugly self thought arise I write my truth in a little bitty journal, I remind myself what really is.




Writing in this tiny little book has been therapeutic and enjoyable, if you are interested in something like this I recommend getting the book 'Loving What Is' by Byron Katie.



Silence really is golden, or I kind of like to see it as Amber (of course I see it as amber).



On a less introspective note, I have begun teaching at CorePower Yoga which has been another goal of mine and I am so thrilled! I feel so deeply grateful. Pursue your passions, because when you walk in your calling....it feels so euphoric.

{ within } - yoga photography musing

I love forward folds in yoga. There is no faster way for my focus to turn inward than to drop into a fold, I crave them. Feeling my belly breathe against my thighs, the stretch of my entire back body, it's like a delicious reprieve from all outside energy.

Tonight I'm folding. Being very still in my own space, in my body, taking that quiet peace all the way to my mind and spirit.



Sometimes I really marvel at how simple some healing work can be. My deepest work recently has taken place as I sit and feel everything, without running away in fear, just feeling all that arises. That has manifest as copious amounts of crying, laughing until my cheeks hurt, grunting with anger, lathering my body with oil and blessing, even throwing rocks at the water. After the expulsion, it's wonderful, I turn inside witnessing that everything is just as it should be and I am still breathing. Not only have I survived, I've grown. I didn't turn away or run, I looked inside to the scariest parts and I found places to soften, to soothe, to release what is no longer serving me.



This is yoga on and off the mat. Breathing, reaching a frightening precipice, breathing, trusting, breathing, stretching, breathing, realizing that I can change patterns in my life and transform my body. Even if I'm not sweating in a studio, I calm my mind, slow my heart rate, steady my gaze, this practice is truly mind, body, spirit.

Centered, I can give and receive love like I've never experienced. When I am strong in self, I am a better mama, teacher, friend, and future lover. Peace and grounding lovebugs, namaste.

{ a wish your heart makes } - yoga. photographer. austin, tx

In 2012 I was fortunate to be an employee for a wonderful brand of athletic gear. My specific role in this company was to work with others and self motivate with goal setting. I grew up surrounded by this jargon, they called it "dream building." My family was heavily involved in Amway when I was a child and the big schtick was to set goals and dream big. Grateful that I have since learned effective goal setting and the bliss of having a dream in my heart, I appreciate that I was exposed to this so early in my life to the idea of thinking outside of what I can easily believe possible. It was in this position as goal setting coach that I took a deep dive into what I honestly want now, in a year, in five years, in ten years......

My goals are this wide spectrum of amazing and ridiculous things I am choosing for my life. They range from spiritual healing to a hot bearded man with many beautiful things to fill life in between work and relationship. One thing I have held as a goal for myself since I was very young is to be in a magazine. When I was 13 my sister and I took turns snapping photos of each other to send to Seventeen Magazine, I cried when I received the "Thanks, but No Thanks" letter in the mail. My obsession with magazines is deep and to be in one has always felt like a fairytale to me, the icing to my cupcake. That is why I am almost without words to express how humbled and fantastically happy I am about having my self portrait featured in the July Issue of Austin Fit Magazine! A dream come true (because I have to be cheesy to clearly convey how awesome this feels to me)!!



What I thought was going to be a small photo somewhere near the back of the magazine turned out to be a two page spread of my photo (and if you look close you can spot my nifty little remote control that I used to fire my own shutter) just a few pages into the magazine. I really want to thank the staff of Austin Fit for choosing my photo and for the beautiful job on the spread, thank you!!!

{ it's like this now } - yoga. photography. healing. energy.

My teacher Denise says something all the time and it has become a mantra for me recently. She says "it's like this now." Without judgement, it just is.

I've missed this blog. Since April I have not had a working wireless internet connection at home and not much free time to tote my laptop around for writing. Tonight feels amazing to have my fingers gliding over these keys again. Sometimes being a single mom on a yoga teacher budget means taking time away from certain things, although it was not my preference to go without internet, I had to accept it and say "it's like this now."



Today I received the coolest news, actually a dream I have had since I was a child. I was honored to have my self portrait featured in Austin Fit Magazine! I will share more in a separate post to come, I'm truly in the most humbled and blissed out state today. In this moment too I am saying "it's like this now." The key is "now." Living in this moment, not past or future. I find myself drifting to the past often, just last night I had a sob fest in my car for someone I mourn the loss of. Plans for tomorrow's classes and schedules swirling in my head...future taking my attention from the now. When I choose to focus and join the flow of energy, I witness the most incredible things. Today such an overflow of pleasure as I guided three students into Hanumanasana (full splits) for the first time of their practice, I saw each face shining with delight and celebrating their triumph over fear. Each "now" holds some gift, sometimes it comes in the form of a lesson I have to learn and other times just as pure unadulterated joy. May I be ever grateful for all that is given to me and be here to experience each and every "now."



My love to each of you and heart full of thanks for your friendship, kindness, and encouragement to keep writing and shooting, you guys have really inspired me and your love is felt strongly. Thank you!

{ artemis } - yogi. photographer. goddess. austin, tx

"Goddess" is a powerful word in my life. It is my life quest, my dharma. I believe in magic, in love, in living from the passionate place inside. In my world breath can turn into crystal snowflakes, sparkle through the air, and land like fine shimmering powder. Emotions can be witnessed and then softened with love as if they are melting into warm golden honey. Beauty is everywhere and God is in everything. My life is not being played out before me like a movie, I am scripting this lovely human experience, I choose to stay hurt or to shift my energy to a happier view. My pain is fear itself, trust is my elixir. I am a goddess, I can see now.

{ standing on the sky } yogi. witness. photographer. austin, tx

I have been taking my downside up. Changing routines and moving in new ways. It feels amazing. Sometimes it is as simple as putting my feet above my head and letting my blood flow, vision, and balance shift. Sometimes it has required a greater strength of will and meant leaving a beloved job to pursue deep passions and fulfill a unique role.



"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. You are unique, and if that is not fulfilled, then something has been lost." - Martha Graham



Today I marvel at how much I have shifted in life just by breathing, noticing, and choosing. Although it has been tremendously scary at times, responding to the gentle pull of my heart's desire is exhilarating. My steps feel lighter, my sleep more sound, and my body more alive. I made a choice to let go of what was known and open to the chance to learn what might be...I want to remember this day and cherish the blessing and reward of giving what I uniquely have, and not letting my fear hold me back. I want to remember to breathe, to be here, to explicitly feel every touch, and experience each sensation. Life is beautiful.

{ un bendy } - yogi. bionic. photographer. austin tx

More often than I can count, in fact once today I have already been told "I can't do yoga, I'm not flexible enough." I smile, I take a breath, and I respond with something along these lines... "I have my entire spine fused with a titanium rod, if I can do yoga, anyone can do yoga." If you're lucky I'll show you my scar while I say it. That sounds abrasive as I type it, but the true emotion behind it is excitement! There aren't people who "can" yoga and people who "can't." Yoga just looks different on different bodies, but what is going on inside can be shared by all.

When I had my surgery to straighten my spine 4 years ago, I woke up strapped to a bed, my body in more pain than I can think of words to describe. I was certain that I had made the biggest mistake ever, that my quality of life was lost, that I would never be able to enjoy playing with my girls or be active again. I held onto that for quite a while, even as I started to recover I felt angry about the range of motion I had lost and the muscle tone that withered away in just one week lying in a hospital bed. Though I was physically pushing myself, running and resistance training, I felt this inner call to a practice I had never known, I wanted to try yoga. A terrifying idea for someone who 6 months previous had been completely unable to turn her head. I started with private lessons and I didn't feel much in my body, yet there was this spark that fired inside of me. Monday became my favorite day because I had that one special hour, it was a magic hour. My body was waking up, and it was happening from the very core, in the dark unexplored places in my soul, mind, heart, blood, bones, muscle, and most importantly...breath.



So if you have ever considered practicing yoga, I am a yoga teacher and therefore biased, I will tell you that it's a wonderful idea and you should give it a try. From my personal experience I can tell you that if you let the practice inside you, open areas where you may be afraid, yoga will change your life.

{ m i d d l e - c h i l d } - stylist. seamstress. photographer. entrepreneur.

Remember when I used to do this?



And this?



Or this perhaps?



It's been a very long time since I have sold my designs. Life has taken turns, I have had adventures, challenges, and learned many beautiful lessons. My passions have grown to include new things, like teaching yoga and spiritual healing!! There aren't enough words for me to express the gratitude I have for the avenues that have lead me to where I am, even the ones that seemed ghastly at the time. My world is alive with new colors and sensations that even my wildest dreams never came close to capturing. Daily I am waking up to new truth, the luminous beauty of the Universe, and to Divine energy. With this shimmering, liquid breath that is washing through me, I have been stirred to remembrance. Nostalgia has rekindled inside me talents which I had left dormant while pursuing new jobs and learnings.

My hands run across fabric and come alive with the desire to drape, sew, and style once again. These fingers of mine have been starving to feel the gentle pull of thread between them as I whip stitch a seam closed or secure a button to a tiny blouse. My scissors are sharp and slice through textiles with anticipation of the garment they are readying for creation. Domestic magic is happening as my serger hums in the late hours of the night and remnants of cotton land in dainty piles as a seam is beautifully sheared and stitched tight. In my second chakra creativity is brimming and memories are flooding me, I know that I am a dress maker, a seamstress, a stylist, a fashion guru, whatever you want to call me...I know in my soul I was born to create.

Available soon for purchase....



Styles born from the spark of divine creativity.

{ moving } yogini. witness. seeker. austin, tx

The direction is subject to change, but movement is happening. My life has been filled with it in recent months. Moving from one job to another. Moving from one dwelling to a new space. Moving my body. Moving forward through generous amounts of resistance. Moving, away or closer to... just constant motion. It's helped me realize that sometimes I just want to be still, be very still and feel held.

There is much background to all of this and I feel like it will find chapters in my memoir. If you are just stumbling onto this blog, or you know me and perhaps we haven't been close enough that you know the events that have lead to me extreme withdrawal, please accept me apologies for my quiet. I am in a training now where I am recognizing ways that I deal with certain things and one huge way is that I isolate. You probably should not expect to keep 100% up to date with me via my blog (or any social media) but I do wish to update more frequently, and truly I have thought many times in "blog posts" and even journal entries that should have been blogged. It has just been a very raw time for me.

I can say that you should look forward to my creative side kicking back in and clothing hitting the market soon! I have been sewing again and I am excited to share that with all of you and would love for you to spread the word! I am stoked to showcase "m i d d l e - c h i l d" very, very soon!!